“God has given you one face, and you make yourself another.” ~William Shakespeare
I want you to like me… I mean really, really like me. I’m one of those people who cares what you think. (Unlike my husband who doesn’t give a rip, and likely doesn’t even notice.)
When it’s important to you to be liked and gain approval, it’s awfully tempting to make yourself appear to be what you think people want to see. I’ve shared before about idiotic things I’ve done to “be” what I thought people expected.
Please don’t pretend you can’t relate. I know only a teensy few women that are 100% comfortable with themselves, in every circumstance and with any person. If you’re one of them: Slow. Clap. Hooray for you because you’ve figured it out. Or maybe you haven’t, but you’ve just got me fooled?
I don’t get as easily tempted as I used to. I’m getting better at being me. It’s taken my whole life to get it, and honestly there are still times when some strange action or word will spring forth and I wonder which of my dormant, hidden personalities pushed it out. (No, I’ve never had a diagnosis of multiple personality disorder, but my inner little girl is in there somewhere.)
At this point in my life, I don’t just want you to like me, I want you to like the real me. I want you to see my insecurities, flaws, mistakes and bad choices and still adore me.
I think we question whether we have enough value in us to overcome all the junk. Am I worth loving in spite of all my crap? What if we reveal ourselves and get rejected? That’s an awful thought. Especially for people who want to be liked, it’s nearly impossible to show your soul.
Here is the key I’ve learned: God absolutely cherishes me. He thinks I’m spectacular. And I haven’t found other areas where He’s wrong, so I must be OK.
If you’re a fellow struggler, I’ll offer you a few tips to help walk this out.
- Figure out who you are. Make a purposeful effort to know yourself. List things like favorite foods, colors, movies, activities. What are you good at? What do you really hate doing?
- What kinds of people encourage and energize you? Cut out the people that make you want to perform or be someone you’re not.
- Practice identifying and resisting the urge to play a role.
- Know that if you get criticized or rejected for being authentic, it is likely by a person who should be on the cut list. Don’t fear losing them because they will never love the real you.
God has created you to be satisfied with yourself. You have so much beauty and talent to offer, why make stuff up? For those you deem worthy, show your soul, not a fancy costume to dress it up.
Authored By Diane Markins